02x06 - Penny for Your Thoughts

This vote box thing, storm in a teacup?

It'll be blown over in a day or two.

Why don't we just get you $1,000 worth of beer and no one's the wiser?

Meryl, you and Hayley, you have to get a lawyer.

This guy is serious.

What if Meryl stepped down as mayor?

Can I say ill-health?

Our mother's corrupt.

( Gasps )

That's sick woman you're talking about up there.

No one's gonna buy that.


( People exclaim )


What are they doing?


It's Jackson Pollock.

They're supposed to do it in class on an A4 sheet.

You wrote a book.

Yeah. Stupid.

It's very good.


It's a sort of meshing of Philip K Dick...


.. and 'Blade Runner' aesthetic...

Are you early?


It's a bad habit from my army days.

But you know that about me.

I hear your mum has a guest tonight.

Yeah. Toke.

I like him.

Do you, though?

Hey, dude.

I'm not really a dude.

I can't, I can't, I can't!

Stop the plane now!

I hate flying.

You trust me, right?

Oh, my God... You drive me crazy.


He's much more handsome in real life, don't you think?

Aren't they wondrous, Floyd?

Worth getting up early for.

All I see is the Hindenburg.

Your mother's up there.

She must really like him.

Do you like him?

I don't dislike him.

He's very...



He has two toothbrushes, one for the morning and one for the night.

Good to know.

( Sighs )

I'm going to need a coffee before roll call.

Toke: Easy. Easy.

Penny: Oh, my God.

Man: See you next time, guys.

Thanks, mate.


It was so good, right?

Are you pumped?

I was a bird. I was a cloud.

When that wind picked up...

You were very brave.

I was foetal in the basket.

Yeah, but you got back up. That's what counts.

( Both laugh )

Next time I'll open my eyes.


Actually, I've got a little something else planned.

You hungry?


Jump on board.

Thanks, mate.

Come on! Heya! Heya!

( Laughs )

Here we go.

( Laughs )

( Both laugh )

It's not my birthday.

Well, why wait?

Floyd: Bags the chocolate croissant.


Can I have this, Mum?

Go ahead.

I was just about to take Floyd to school.

Oh, no, no, there's plenty of food for everyone, so let's all eat together and I'll drop him in after.

What's this?


That is my special gym gear.

Uh, Danish, Toke?

Oh, no, thank you.

I don't do carbs after 5:00.


That makes me anxious.

( Half-laughs )

( Half-laughs )

( Theme music )

♪ I'm going out the country, ♪
♪ babe, don't you want to go? ♪
♪ I'm going out the country, ♪
♪ babe, don't you want to go? ♪
♪ I'm going someplace where I've never been before ♪
♪ I'll leave this city, ♪
♪ I've got to get away ♪
♪ I'm gonna leave this city, ♪
♪ I've got to get away ♪
♪ All this fussing and fighting, ♪
♪ man, you know, I sure can't stay. ♪

( Moans ) Oh, my God.

Oh! Oh, my god!

( Beeping )

Oh! Oh, my God!

( Thud )

Keep going!

Keep going. Oh!

( Yelps )

( Calls out )

( Pants )


( Laughs )


It wasn't that good.

Okay, maybe it was.

But there's always room for improvement.

I've gotta go.

Another meeting in the hospital.

Or stay and wait for my break at 11:00.

And then what?

My break at 5:00.

( Laughs )

I'm pretty sure keeping a woman in your room for s*x is illegal.

See you next time.


Are you sure this is all they sent?

Yes, Meryl. That's all they would give me.

Your office said not to worry.

Your replacement has everything under control.


It seems so final.

Mum, these are from your bridge club.

Oh, you're a doll.

Right, I'm off.


Or as I like to put it, the crushing of my eternal soul.

Don't be so dramatic.

Hey, guys.


Matt, can you drive your father to Orange?

No, no, no, no. I'll do it myself. I'll see you.

What are you doing in bed?

You realise there's absolutely nothing wrong with you?

I had a number of unexpected concerned visitors.

Yeah, well, I'm not one of them.

I'm here to borrow a chainsaw.

You know the more you cover this up, the worse it's gonna get?

Be on my side, angel. Favourite son.

( Ringing tone )

( Mobile phone rings )


Hugh, darling. My prodigy.

What do you need?

An end to this purgatory.

How soon before I can be back on my feet?

You're the one who committed us to the defibrillator.

Yes. Well, it had to look convincing.

Sorry, you'll have to fake convalescence a little longer.

Two weeks.

( Sighs ) You're no help. Bye.

( Hangs up )

I'll take your bag.

Thank you.

Mark on the chart that she's allergic to penicillin.

And nil by mouth before day surgery.

Thank you.

I need your signature here.


( Laughs )

That's professional.

If I may, as one well versed in the art of lovemaking, his technique is quite impressive.

Your assault by Celia hardly makes you the resident sexpert.

My new-found sexual awakening is confronting to some.

Ken, you nearly asphyxiated.

Now, that's a man.

( Scoffs )

( Sighs )

( Penny laughs )

I have observed that he is methodically making steps towards the capturing of her heart.

If that's what she wants.

Your eyes don't match your mouth.

Doors are closing, my friend.

Better make a serious move before he does.

Love you.

Floyd: Bye, Mum.

Bye. See you.

( Seatbelt clicks )

What a morning, huh?

Hey? Oh!

I am lovin' life right now.

So, uh, your mum, are her folks around?

Yeah, Nan and Pop are in Port Macquarie.

They have chickens and believe in the death penalty.


Um, do you reckon you could give me your Pop's number?


There's just a little question I need to ask him.

Sounds serious.

You bet I am, buddy.

( Starts engine )

God, I'm good. Hello, commission.

Great. Hey, I've been thinking...

That's unusual.

Why don't we go legit?


Move in with me.

Come on, you're always saying how boring it is on the road.

We can keep each other company.

Let me think about it.


You're married?

Not married.


Really not.

Gay, but confused?

I know it's hard to fathom, but I just don't want to.

( Half-laughs )

Kim. Kimmy... let's crank it up.

Try and be more than just this.

Hugh. Hughie...

Actually, you know what, what the hell.

Let's do it.

I'll move in.

How's the panic coursing through your body right now?

Yeah, it's pretty intense.


No need ruining a good thing.

I knew you'd see reason.


Yeah, bye.

What do you think?

You're still looking good.

Do I have long?

You need to put your affairs in order.

Thank you, Doctor.

My turn.

I need to check that hole in your heart, mister.

How's the cafe?

I got employee of the month.

( Gasps ) Congrats!

And your dad?

He drove to Armidale to sell some of our sheep.

Just a minute, Max.



I need to talk to you.

I was just calling you.

( Replaces handset )

I have a Down syndrome patient with ventricular septal defect.

The murmur seems loud.

Take a look.


This is called an echocardiogram.

You ready? This might be a bit cold.

Here we go.

Now, these are notoriously hard to read, for most doctors.

Just do the scan.

All right.

Well, there's only a slight increase in pulmonary vasculature.

I don't see any reason to examine you any further.

You're in good health.

I made nationals for gymnastics.

And I want to be in the army.


Though I have found that the army does produce big w*nk*rs.


Thanks for that.

We'll keep an eye on him.

VSD can be a sleeper in some Down syndrome patients.


You know.

I don't know.

He's gotta go.


I like to call him Joke.

I enjoy him as Oke.

Grow up.

24 hours or I...

You turn into a pumpkin?

I'm just saying, don't be the one who goes closing doors between us when you don't know what might happen if you leave them open.

That was convoluted.

10:53 tomorrow. I'll need your answer.

I'll give it to you now.

Sleep on it.

It's no.

24 hours.

( Sighs )

( Low-level conversation )

Are you okay?

My God, you're soaked.

I had to leave work because the school couldn't tell me where my son was.

Well, we just went to the oval for maths, Mrs. Kokkotas.

But I saw the bush there, so I thought that...

I'm a think-outside-the-box educator.

I care about those poor millennials and I try and give them an actual experience once in a while.

Well, it's not caring to deviate from the syllabus.

They'll fall behind their peers.

Their marks are fine.

They love the way I teach.

You made them do headstands before roll call.

What's wrong with that?

This physio invoice right here.


You cannot take students out into a storm.

An unseasonal storm.

See? Global warming.

All education, all the time.

You've had three warnings. You're out of luck.

You're not...

Writing to the board?

Oh, you bet I am.

( Laughs ) Well, you can't.

Oh, I have waited for this day.

I'm fired?

We call it transferred.

( Sighs )

Found it online. It's the most beautiful oak desk.

And I thought we could put it in the sunroom, like a real writer's studio.

And I need to buy a new ergonomic chair too.


And a new laser printer.

'Cause I can't be a full-time writer without quality toner.

And yes, I know what you're thinking.

Charlie's a procrastinator.

Well, not anymore, 'cause I bought a new internet lockout system, so I'm gonna do it at least four hours of writing a day.

Five. Seven.

You have to get your job back.

Don't stomp on my dreams, Matt.

You can't just not work. We can't afford it.

Not until this takes off, anyway.

I expected this kind of resistance.

All the greats go through it, Austen, Kipling, Orwell.

How did you even get three warnings?

Bruce Collins is an autocratic old-school prick.

He's all right.

I want to be a writer.

And you can be, afternoons and weekends.

Go ask for your job back. Beg like you mean it.

( Growls )

And '1984' was really depressing!

Are you sure about this, Meryl?

If Rod Eagle find out that we tried to access the council files...

Did Helen Keller let her disability stop her?

I think not.

But you're not actually sick.

Oxygen. Quickly, quickly.

( Mock-coughs )

Oh, hello, Mrs. Daley.

Oh, what a miracle!

It's nice to have you back.

Oh, thanks, love.

I couldn't stay away.

Look, your sense of duty has no bounds.


You see what I mean, Hayley?

Oh, there's the man I've been meaning to talk to.

I thought you were on death's door.

I'm feeling much better, Tim. Thank you for asking.

I'd like you to return what you have of mine.

Hayley, could you get me a juice?

I'm feeling parched all of a sudden.

Yes, Meryl. Citrus or berry?


What about a blend?



Not the paragon of discretion, are we, Mr. Heinrich?

Spreading inebriated falsehoods around the town and trying to bribe a police officer.

I don't know what you're talking about.

But since you lost your position on the council, Meryl, our deal is off.

Actually, I had the most inspired thought from my sick bed.

You know the land we have a mutual interest in?

The site can still be rezoned but for a far nobler purpose.

Thrill me.

Nuclear fuel rod storage.

Shall we have Devonshire tea so I can talk you through it?

They only had apple.

Thank you.

There are many ways to claw your way back to power, Hayley.

It's a matter of finding it.

( Charlie intones )

( Breathes rapidly through nose )


( Exhales )


Mr. Collins?


( Squeaking )


( Toy squeaks )


Don't look!

I'm not looking.

What do you want?

I came to talk to you about the letter, whether you'd sent it to the board yet.

Please, Bruce, I need my job back.

( Laughs )

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I hadn't sent the letter. But I'm gonna do it right now.

( Laughs )

Come on, Ken. Curl your thumb. That's it.

Keep your upper arm close to your body.

I must. I will.

Nothing like some lunchtime testosterone.

Raise your wrist. Raise your wrist. That's it.


That's it.

I'm winning.

( Both grunt )

( Growls )


Winning in life, yeah, you are, dude.

Thanks for the meal plan, dude.


Hey, protein's your friend. Do you meditate?

Looks like we have a rival for Toke.

Are you distracting my staff, Doctor?

Well, I was but now I'm here to distract you.

Do you want to grab some sushi?

Hugh: Hey.


Lunch would be great.

( Siren wails )


I'm partial to sushi.

Woman: 50-year-old male, high-speed MVA.

Chest and pelvic injuries.

It's Harry, Max's dad!

Take him straight through.

Mia, we need to put in a central line while he waits for evac to Melbourne.

Max: Dad!


Max, Max, your dad was in an accident.

He collided with another car.


Can you fix him?

We can't.

We don't have the facilities here to help him.

But they'll come and get him and they'll fly him to Melbourne.


Max, Max, Max, he'll be okay.

He'll be okay, Max.

Do you have anyone that I can call?

No. It's just me and him.


( Cries )

It's beautiful.


Penny's new bloke booked it.


You didn't get your job back?

No, I did not.


I sprung Mr. Collins dressed as a baby and then I accidentally laughed and then I don't even know.

Penny's a lucky girl.

Wait, dressed as a baby?

It's so weird, right?

I can't stop googling it.

It's like some weird executive stress relief thing, men in power wanting to unwind.

Well, now you've got something on him.

I would never do that.


Sometimes I wish I was a barmaid.

That's hot.

Or a childcare worker.

Less hot.

Or something that doesn't involve the near death of parents.


It was close, but he's stable.

I hope it stays that way or I don't know what will happen to Max.

He's got no other family.

Harry takes him to all his gymnastic trainings.

They're such a tight unit.

And he'll be in Melbourne by morning.


Gotta go.

You better tuck in early tonight. Big decision tomorrow.

Are you really gonna go there now?

What did we learn today?

Life is fleeting and unpredictable.

Flo just tied Ken to the water cooler and I need to lock up.

Oh, crap. Sorry, Betty.

Oh, no. I totally forgot.

Toke, surprise tonight.

Surprises lose the element of surprise when they happen daily.

Can you take the boys for a few hours?

Please, please, please.

Sorry, no can do.

I've got my Grade Six flute exam tonight.

I guess I could cancel.

No, no, you go.

You're going to stay with me tonight.

But I wanna stay with Dad.

All night? You can't.

Come on.

( Strains )

( Blows )

( Sighs )

( Groans )

( Taps key )

( Laughs )

Toke: It sounds like a rough day.

I couldn't leave him at the hospital.

It's really beyond your call, Pen.

I know.

Max: You have no muscle tone.

Floyd: I'm pretty sure that's an ab.

It's not.

Can you help me make some?


Let's warm up. Lunges.

I had a similar IVC case when I was deployed to Kabul.

The guy didn't make it, though.

Deeper. Knee to the ground.

Oh... this is brutal.

Man up, Floyd. Come on. One, two, three and lunge.

Just because I'm Down syndrome, doesn't mean I need help coaching.


You were saying?

I was just saying...

Jumping jacks.

Does my core look different?

It's rock-hard, buddy.

Oh! Oh!

Could you guys maybe go inside?

Tuck and roll.


Just be careful in there, fellas. There's, ah, candles.

Do you want some more wine?

What's this?

Sweet berry wine.

"Darling, enclosed is a model of "the Mercy Ship off the coast of Africa.

"My dream is for us to..."

( Laughs ) Thank you.

( Laughs )


Wait, you already worked on a Mercy Ship.

Yeah. And I want to go back, with you.

They have family rooms.

What's a Mercy Ship?

It's a floating hospital.

Can Dad go in it to get better?

I'm going to look for more cards.


Are you going to show me your boobs?

Oh, gross.

( Laughs )


Oh, man.

Okay. Okay. He's staying with us for just a couple of nights, right?

Oh. Yes.


How did dialysis go, love?

It was fine.

Did you give Dr. Chang my marmalade?

No, I forgot. Why the interrogation?

Blood came in, piss went out.

Can I have some potatoes, please?

Here you go.

Spuds make everything better.

Can I come next time, Dad?

It's very dull.

Charlie held up at work?

Uh, yep.

A meeting? It's not P&C night.







I'm just... I'm eating... I'm eating my beans.




Come on, boy.


Out with it.

I don't think I'm allowed to tell you.

Oh, that's ridiculous. I'm your mother.

It's a sacred bond.

Charlie got fired.

Hey, everyone. Sorry I'm... late.

So you got fired? Why?


She mind-controlled me!

Mr Collins was threatened by her, apparently.

Well, I thought it was really hard to get fired from the public service.

Everyone relax. I'm not being fired.

I've been transferred.

Saint Benedict's is a really good school.

It's two hours away.

That's not too bad.

Did you even try to get your job back?

Yeah, and she made it worse.

That wasn't my fault.

Mr. Collins, you say?





I'm sifting through my memory bank for something important.

( Groans )

Mr. Collins, watch out.

No, Meryl, I don't want your type of help.

I'm begging you to stay out of it. Please.

What time does the sun come up tomorrow?

About 5:50.

Matt, Ajax, meet me at the school then.

Oh, please don't make me hide in any more water tanks.

Oh, God.

Try and fell it near that bench.

( Stars engine )

( Sighs )



Hey, buddy.

I was just helping your mum look for her contact lenses but we can't... we can't find them.

I know about foreplay.


Forgot to tell you, I need to make a model of the Taj Mahal.


For geography. Tomorrow.


It's Max Kerr, with a double pike twist.


( Laughs )

And he's done it! Gold for Australia!



How was it?


The s*x.


What... No. Nude.

Nude here, dude. Nude.

Cuddles. Oh, cuddles.

Mmm. There's nothing better.

I really miss my dad, Penny.

I know you do.

When he gets better, can we all live together?


( Laughs )

How did you get it up there?


You paged me?

Yes. Interesting case.

Marble stuck up his nose. I've tried to force it out.


No, regular size, I think.


Kidney dish?

( Blows )


I mean, what's the physics of that?

I don't know. Some old country GP once showed me it.

Come on.

Just see Betty on your way out.

Thank you.

Oh, would you, uh, look at the time?

Only two hours to go. Exciting.

You know, despite the fact that I generally don't respond to being pressured, why don't you just admit this whole ultimatum is motivated by petty jealousy and ego?

Maybe it's not.

Are you for real?

I might be.

Just a few hours later and, splat, an entire kindergarten class could've been wiped out.

Imagine that, Mr Collins. Oh, a tragedy of epic proportions.

That's extreme, Meryl.

As was your decision to fire Charlie Pereira.

What has she told you?


Then what has she got to do with this?

Minutes from the P&C meeting last November.

There were concerns about this rotting tree then and you agreed to have it removed and you didn't.

Now, I'm pretty sure no one's going to remember it and I for one am not going to remind them once you organise a panel to independently reassess Ms. Charlie Pereira's position.

She deserves a fair hearing.

She deserves what she got.

I may not be mayor but I'm still the eyes and ears of this town.

Everybody has their secrets and you, sir, I know yours.

It'd be terrible if I let something slip.

( Ringing tone )

( Mobile phone rings )

Bloody Hugh.

Penny: ( On voicemail ) You've reached Penny Cartwright.

Please leave a message.

( Ends call )

Oh, New Delhi. Oh, I loved India. It's amazingly filthy.

And it gets in your blood.

Mm-hm. I was deployed there for Special Forces training.

It is an amazing place.

Toke, do you ever have nightmares?


You seem calm but I sense a deep restlessness.

You have PTSD.

I don't have PTSD.

Why is Toke annoyed?

He has PTSD.

Your nervous system has really taken a hit from Kabul and the Mercy Ship.

I think I would know.

Actually, most veterans don't.

No, no, I wasn't in combat. I was a medic.

Well, even worse. A passive witness to horror.

I'm starting to question your commitment to training, Floyd.

Is it that time already?


Go get 'em, fellas.

Remember, no pain, no gain.

Go easy on me.

I think I pulled my hammy.

( Laughs )

Can I ask you a question, Toke?


Do you really believe that the universe is aligning yours and Penny's hearts?



Well, then, I wish you luck.

I suppose only time, in her infinite wisdom, will tell who the victor of love shall be.

Why don't I take those boys to a movie, let you and Penny have some space?

Yes. Thank you. Yes, that would be awesome.

You told him what?

I told him what he needed to know in order to secure a second chance for you.

But I haven't told you anything, Meryl.

So there is something?


Yes. But you don't know what it is and you shouldn't have pretended that you did.

I don't want my job back if it means burning Mr. Collins.

I'm not you. I don't know how to do this stuff.

If Mr. Collins' happiness is more important to you than the mediocre dulling of those young minds...

You've completely stacked the panel. Unbelievable.

Nonsense. Perfect slice of the community.

Okay, everybody, if you wouldn't mind taking your seats, please.

Now, I've declared my conflict of interest as adjudicator and I think we all agreed that my neutrality is a given.

Now, this panel here is to reassess the firing of Ms. Charlie Pereira from the Whyhope School.

Charlie will present her case first.

I believe in progressive education.

I believe in challenging young hearts and minds.

Now, I've only just begun with these kids.

Please, don't take me away from them when I still have so much work to do.

They're our future generation and I'm here to show them the way.

If that's wrong, then sack me.

Woman: Well said.


On you, Charlie.

( Applause )

( Door closes )

( Sighs )


Betty deserves a medal.


What shall we do?




Awkward car s*x?

( Half-laughs )

Penny, I've... I've been doing all this fancy stuff, like dinners and hot-air balloons because...

Well, um, the truth is...

It's time and there's only one question I need to know.

Penny Cartwright...

Before your question, I have three.

All right.

What if I foster Max for good?

Then we'll...

Can you give up your life to live in Whyhope?

Because I can't live anywhere else.

I'm sure I...

I can't go on the Mercy Ship with you, Toke, even if they've got family rooms.

If you stay with me, can you handle missing out on the things that you love?

Sleep on it tonight.


Hi, babe.

Meryl: Well, you've heard from all the parties and the panel have conferred.

( Upbeat voice ) We have a result, folks.

( Mock-coughs, clears throat )

( Mock-coughs )

Please welcome back the teacher of Class 6C, Ms. Charlie Pereira.


Charlie! Charlie!

Thank you.



You can't reinstate someone that has no regard for policy, no understanding of the bell curve...

Order. Please.

She does not follow protocols and protocols are all we have to achieve our desired outcomes.

Don't spit the dummy, mate.


The panel have made a decision.

Well, keep your job, Pereira.

Keep your minion, Meryl.

If she's coming back, I'm not.

Consider this my resignation.

( Muttering )

Oh, dear, what an unfortunate display.

But since we suddenly find ourselves in this position, I think we need to discuss the role of acting principal.

I'd like to nominate Charlie Pereira.

Shall we take a vote?


Sorry. I couldn't find my phone.

When did you pack that?

Ah, about 3am.

Couldn't sleep.


No... It's not because of Floyd.


Or Max.

Maybe it was a little bit of Max, which makes me sound like an arsehole, which I'm not trying to be. It's just...

Every time I try and connect with you, we're...



And you are so...


Yes. And I don't know if I...

Can be too.

You're so embedded here and everyone wants a piece of you.

You don't have room for me.

I've tried to make room.

I know. I know.

Just... I want...

I need more out there.

Let's try again. I'll be more available to you.

( Beeping )

( Beeping continues )

Do you think I'm like Meryl?

Well-dressed and good at crosswords?

Oppositional and Machiavellian.

I'd say my ears are burning, but it's actually my heart with the knowledge that you are back where you belong.

Congratulations, Charlie. Mmm.

Isn't it wonderful? Promoted.

Thanks, Meryl.

I can't believe I'm gonna be principal.

Acting. Now...

( Exhales )

What are these?

Nuclear fuel rod show bags.

Hayley helped me put them together.

I don't remember these at the Easter Show.

Now, I want you to distribute those to your students.

They'll take them home to their parents and that's called education by osmosis.

Must go. Jim and I are going to the vineyard for brunch.

Bye-bye, darlings.

Uranium Kids?

Resistance is futile.

Where's Joke?



Back to Sydney.


Well, I... guess you made the right decision.

Stop gloating. This had nothing to do with your annoying ultimatum.

Oh, I won.

You totally sent him away.

I'm actually feeling quite sad about it.

As am I.

Look, tears.

So... now that you're free and single...

Is that what I am?

As am I.

What about Kimberly?

Oh, she was getting really clingy.